I want the words of my heart when I worship You
to be the mark I leave on this world.
I ask that my words of praise be recorded by an angelic scribe for all eternity
as King David’s words of praise will live forever in Your sight.
I thought today of how short life is as I feather dusted needlepoint pictures from a grandmother long dead.
“What mark will I leave?” I thought as I worked. I am nearing 50. A year away. ..Life here isn’t long at all, even if I live long I will be fortunate to reach my years of nearly 50 once again. 100 is not common really…”Teach me”, Moses said, “to number my days so I may present to Thee a heart of wisdom”. Well, I, Katherine, want to present a heart that knew You and loved You intensely. Praise, true love- like a man for a woman love…admiration, respect, awe….these things I want to present to Thee – plus a heart of wisdom….
I looked on my garden, which gives me such delight. It’s nothing compared to the great gardens in England; the ones that people travel the world to tour.
The greatest endeavors of man, like intricate English gardens, are soon relegated to the back burner as the new fascinates us, whatever the “new” is.
So I will bypass man and the thrill of the “new” altogether as I seek to leave my mark.
I will, instead, leave my mark for eternity with my voice.
I ask, God, that my words of praise be recorded.
You say we are judged by our word. So my word will be of praise.
When I look at my garden, and the delights it affords, I think I’d rather be here than anywhere on this sacred mountain called Adytum, The Sanctuary, that you have given as my home.
Looking at Your creation and the beauty, the intricacy of it all moves me from praise to tears of joy and appreciation. We both love making others happy, but You, Lord, have gone completely over the top in so doing…
Don’t think I don’t see it and know what You were thinking when You were busy creating all this for us, for me who love You so... I feel Your ancient joy. I see it now, the thoughts of love translated into beings. Plant beings. Bird beings. People and animal beings….
Your heart was full of love…IS full of love still for us and I see it, feel it, know it. I love you back Lord God with my whole heart, mind and spirit. I know You feel it too. I see Your smile. I see Your eyes…The eyes of the spirit have that ability to see into the spirit, as You so wisely enabled the enlightened to do.
I think of the Great Mind that created all this for my pleasure. How I love You for doing that. Giving me flowers everyday from spring to late autumn- that is the Lord that loves me and how You think.
And the beauty of them…the colors, the form, the variety and the ability to withstand cruel storms and still stand strong. Just amazing that You crafted them that way.
The birds…the gentle gray breasted doves, the cocky robins, the pheasant who has come to call this “home”, the shy nuthatch, the elegantly singing song sparrow and the feisty blue jay…countless colorful evening grosbeaks who wake the dawn in their praise of Your great Name. How they enchant me. I can sit for hours watching them. The great owl who precedes the dawn by an hour to give rise to his voice of praise to You.
All creation praises You, Great Father. Only man is unaware, unenlightened man….
The soft breezes lift the branch of the Elderberry, soon to bloom, so lightly that it appears to dance for You. The Grand Fir waves its arms in pure rejoicing. King David said they clapped their hands, and so they do, in time to unheard music. Only the evolved hear with the ears of the heart.
You are the breeze, the softness that caresses All in All. You are everywhere and inside of me, all at once….How I love You tonight.
Every day, Holy Spirit, praise God through me. I have no voice to speak of for singing…but I hear You praising God in my heart singing so beautifully….I know that one day, that perfection will come pouring out of my mouth in song…but for now, I am, as Rumi said, the reed for Your Breath.
There is nothing I can do in this world more important than appreciating the Magnificent One who created it, heaven and the world to come. You did it for us, for Your great pleasure. I am secure in Your love. I want You to feel mine and my respect, admiration and devotion.
It is the mark I will strive for ~ to leave the mark of one who knew God and praised Him.
If You do great things through me that bless and uplift mankind, so be it. But the greatest thing I will be remembered for in heaven throughout eternity, for my time on earth is this one thing:
Katherine loved God Almighty to the point of her voice of praise continually breaking into the heavens, joining with sacred angels in their worship and admiration and love of the One True God.
